Helping Us With Memory

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What Else Can I Do Now? We all get “stuck” once in a while. The “stuck” part generally feels bad. We may feel lost, afraid, immobile and seriously looking for divine intervention. In fact, this feeling of being out of control probably brings many people closer to God than any preacher ever could, as in, “Oh, God, if you help me out of this one I’ll never curse/smoke/cheat etc. again.” But, as all things come to pass, isn’t it also true that when you get back on track and through the tough time, it’s not the situation that stays in your mind over time, but the style and class with which you did or did not handle the situation? When you took the high road in resolving a relationship issue, when you made the better decision to improve the performance in your business, when you decided to stand up for yourself in a meaningful situation; these are the character building moments that help define a life lived well. Once again the old truth is that it isn’t what happens in life that matters, but how we decide to handle it that either empowers or disenfranchises us. Making judgments out of frustration when we get “stuck” shows our limitation and emotional immaturity. When we feel stuck and are offered answers through a friend, mentor, book or seminar, it is typical for many to say, “I know that” and ignore possibilities. That little three word statement “I know that,”will close the door to seeing things in a different way.  Why not look at every training, seminar, inspirational writing or idea offered with a fresh openness? A far better way to move ahead, solve the problem and show some character is to ask a question such as, “What else can I do now?” Really good therapists, coaches, teachers and parents don’t try to solve the problems of their clients, students or children. They ask questions to let the client, student or child discover for themselves, not just the answer to the existing dilemma, but to discover and use the potential problem solving ability that each of us has within. When you ask the question, “What else can I do now?” and you get the lazy response from within, “I’ve done all I can,” ask yourself, “If there were something else I could do, what would it be?” Don’t let yourself off the hook so easily. Resist the tendency to be lazy and cave in. Only when you ask yourself what more you can do, will your mind provide you with an answer. For those of you who have heard me speak in classes, seminars or at business conferences, I always suggest learning relaxation techniques that can be used to create physical energy, facilitate learning of new habits and attitudes and to exercise the creativity and problem solving abilities of the mind (right brain stuff). Without taking the time to sell any new readers of this newsletter on the virtues and values of learning and practicing this proven idea, just take a few minutes to relax and then ask yourself “What else can I do now?” and watch how much better the flow of ideas come. Closing the door to thought will always stifle creativity and growth. The next time you come to a dead end, notice your thinking process, relax and ask yourself a good question. You will be amazed at the options you come up with. Show yourself what you can do.  Soon you’ll be doing this exercise automatically and well.  Use this idea often to challenge and get the best from yourself continuously.

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